New Year, New Home

There are boxes everywhere I look, in every room of the house, some empty, some half empty and some still taped completely closed. It feels like everything is crashing in on me, with absolutely nothing being in it’s place, because it doesn’t have a place yet in our new home. 

Trying to cook a home cooked meal has proven to be very difficult and frustrating since making the move Wednesday. The fan above the stove won’t turn on (I swear it worked during the inspection), so I smoked us out while cooking breakfast sausage for dinner last night. I swear I still smell charred bits of sausage over 24 hours later. And as of Thursday night, the kitchen sink and the dishwasher drain extremely slow, like gunky water that gurgled up when I ran the disposal doesn’t go down the drain until many hours later. 

We have placed a call in to the Home Warranty people, and are waiting for the plumber that they approved of, to call us and schedule a service on our new to us, old fixer upper home. This was of course after we spent a couple hours Thursday night trying to diagnose the backed up sink problem using You Tube as a guide for us novice homeowners. After removing all of the piping under the sink to check for clogs and pulling out the dishwasher filter and checking the tubing behind it, we have determined that the clog must be in the pipes headed out of the house to the sewer and that it is more than we can fix ourselves. 

Also the house came with a hibernating desert tortoise in the backyard, ironically named Chompy, which our Husky-Lab puppy, Sweetums, promptly found, dug up and insists on tossing around and chewing on like a good old tennis ball. Now that she has woken Chompy from his hibernation, he insists on strolling all over the backyard and not staying in the turtle habitat safe house we renovated for him. 

In the process of the turtle habitat renovation, Lieutenant Amazing's eye was split open by a skateboard that Captain Awesome was attempting to ride down a slide. With blood, sweat and tears on my shirt, I held a pack of frozen green beans on my youngest boy's eye. 

And my husband tells me last night, “I would do it again. I know we made the right decision.” Even given all the madness that we have moved into, he would do it again. I guess I’m questioning whether I would do it again. Honestly this move has been the hardest move I’ve ever experienced, both emotionally and physically. I’m not sure why it’s been so hard, but it has. I feel completely drained and all out of sorts. The worst thing is, tomorrow we start school and work again. I’m not ready to go back to work. I wanted the house in order before we started work again, but that's not reality.

I knew that I was a perfectionist and that I am kind of OCD, but I really had no idea how bad I was until we started moving this time. I’ve moved many times in my life, but for whatever reason, this time, I can’t stand things not being in their places. Maybe it's because I'm getting older. Maybe it's the lack of control. The fact that everything is in boxes and that I can’t find what I need when I need it, is driving me insane. 

I’ve shed many tears over the last three days and expect to shed many more. This is not at all how I anticipated starting my new year. I pictured a perfect move, with no hiccups and thought that I would be ready to start work tomorrow. I am far from ready and am feeling very anxious and extremely overwhelmed. Yet, I can’t see myself giving up and losing the battle to chaos. That’s not me. I will find a way with the support of my family, no matter how tough it gets. 2019 is not going to get the best of me. I will get the best of 2019.